Crunchy Messes, Pygmy Goats, Jumping Cars: All in a Day’s Work for Local Police


The following stories have been collected from various Minnesota newspaper “Police Reports.”

Police officers (and the reporters writing the news) must have great senses of humor to handle issues like these every day.

From The Woodbury Bulletin:

A Woodbury woman reported a fight at 9:34 p.m. Nov. 6 in a parking lot along Cobble Hill Alcove, but police found two adults jumping a car and four children running around the lot, being rowdy. They were advised of the complaint and asked their kids to stop screaming.

Woodbury Public Safety responded to a report of eight people yelling and throwing things at 4:14 p.m. Nov. 5 near the Valley Creek Mall Subway. A Woodbury woman and a St. Paul man were fighting in public after a recent break-up. Words were exchanged, she twice drove over his feet, an altercation started, a Subway employee broke it up, and the woman smashed a cellphone on the ground. No one wanted to press charges.

Lots of cars were parked on the street near the intersection of Oak Ridge Trail and Savanna Oaks Lane, a caller told police at 12:24 a.m. Oct. 31. Police checked the area for a large party that might cause issues, but instead observed three cars in the street and located no festivities.

At 4:26 p.m. Nov. 1, police responded to property along Manning Avenue and Bailey Road for a complaint about goose hunting near a residential area. A resident of Grant produced a city permit for hunting on the land. He and three other hunters seemed aware of the dangers of shooting with houses in close proximity, and decoys were set up so that the hunting party was not shooting in the direction of the nearby houses. The complainant was advised that hunting in that specific area of Woodbury is allowed with a permit.

From Lillie News:

Officers responded to Tony Schmidt Regional Park on Lake Johanna Boulevard Nov. 29 when they received multiple reports around 3:30 p.m. about two pygmy goats wandering around the park. When police arrived, the pet goats were gone and had reportedly found their way home. According to police, this is an “ongoing issue.”

Police received a call from a house on the 1400 block of Colleen Avenue reporting a suspicious vehicle in the neighborhood at 10:59 p.m. Nov. 28. Police arrived but the mentioned car was not in the area. In fact the family that made the report said it hadn’t been there for a while, and that they were just calling to inform police. When officers asked for a description of the vehicle, each family member gave a different description of it. All they agreed on was that it was driving very slowly. Helpful to the police? Not really, according to the police report.

A woman called police after she heard what she thought might be someone walking on her house’s roof at 3:36 a.m. Dec. 1 on the 3900 block of Virginia Circle. Police responded and did not see anything suspicious. They said it might have been a raccoon on her roof.

More from Lillie News:

After spotting a driver swerve down Snelling Avenue, a patrol officer pulled the car over at 9 p.m. Nov. 17. The 33-year-old Roseville man appeared to be drunk, but when he was taken to Ramsey County Detox he became rather uncooperative and began using offensive language and racial slurs, which accelerated his arrest. Police skipped the detox step and sent him directly to a jail cell.

The manager of an apartment building on the 1100 block of County Road E reported finding a puzzling mess of broken potato chips and dirt in the lobby the morning of Nov. 13. He reviewed video surveillance and found that three boys spent a blissful four minutes fooling around, tipping over flowerpots and throwing potato chips at each other. The kids were not tenants of the building, and the manager did not recognize them. They simply entered, had some fun, and exited, leaving behind a crunchy mess.

Someone may not be a fan of outdoor light displays. Police received two calls last week reporting that a vandal cut strands of outdoor decorative lights on the 2600 block of Clearview Avenue. Perhaps it’s just a neighbor who’s not big on celebrating Christmas before Thanksgiving.

If your local paper has a cleverly written “Police Report” or “Police Blotter,” please share it with Alpha News by emailing a link to pbagnpghf@nycunarjfza.pbz, with “Police Reports” in the subject line.

Andrea Mayer-Bruestle